| When you're young you get sad... |
[Mar. 7th, 2008|02:19 am] |
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When you were young people didn't tell you that working at a desk was the most you could ever hope for. If you go into a room of 1st graders and ask em how many can sing all those kids will raise their hands. Go into the same classroom full of the same kids now seniors 11 or so years down the road and ask the same question... Maybe A hand. To be the king of wasted potential... doesn't feel so good. |
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| Hi. How are you? |
[Nov. 24th, 2007|01:15 am] |
My name is Caleb Stahl. I haven't posted in a long time.
Let's see how this goes. |
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| HAY! |
[Apr. 20th, 2007|02:39 am] |
I'm drunk.
That's pretty much the only time I make posts anymore.
I'm so hungry.... for things of a non physical nature. |
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| Oh.... |
[Mar. 25th, 2007|12:56 am] |
By the way...
I should own 4 houses by the end of the year.
Kinda got into real estate.
Forgot to mention that in muh last post. |
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| It's that time again.... |
[Mar. 22nd, 2007|12:08 am] |
Well I suppose an update is in order.
Ummm, I quit pizza hut and I'm working at a software company called Data Management Inc. I'm tech support for this Time card program. It's cool my co-workers are straight from the movie Grandma's Boy.
Let's see dating wise... I was talking to a girl for a couple of weeks but she just wanted to have sex so that didn't really work out. She was a girl who turned me down in high school so I really wanted to make her fall in love with me and break her heart out of spite, but she just wanted my weiner.
It used to be that I would immediatly fall in love with any girl I slept with, but a few days before New Years I slept with this chick and I just hated it. Not the sex part but after it. It was weird, I came out of the bathroom after washing up and the girl just looked disgusting to me. And she wasn't disgusting to me before i fucked her, just after. So I fucked her again a couple more times just to make sure. But she was still disgusting to me and anything she said to be sweet was pathetic and repulsive. And I hated her and I hated myself and I didn't want to ever talk to her again. So I didn't.
that scared me. I decided right then that if all i want from a girl is sex it would be better just to think about her when i jack off.
I have been working out again for about 4 weeks. In 2 weeks I'm gonna take steroids for the hell of it.
I live a completely selfish existence and I'm fine with that for a while.
Honestly, I like my life right now, and I don't get lonely that often.
Oh I made a goal of reading Times 100 best novels of the 20th century. I've read about 30 so far.
That's about all that's going on in my life right now, work in the week go out on the weekends I'm really very boring. |
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| Good news! |
[Jan. 22nd, 2007|05:26 am] |
In may I will own my first house! I plan on renting it out and making a good deal of profit from it. If this goes well I may continue to buy houses, monopoly style.
Yes my last post was slightly psychopatic. To be honest I was shitcanned when i wrote it but I decided long ago that I wouldn't delete my drunk posts because while they are embarassing, they're also pretty damn funny to look back on. I whine when im wasted that I'm not married with kids on the way but hell I'm not ready for any of that shit.
And I obsess over things I haven't worried about in forever.
oh yah buff warriors. |
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| A comprehensive update is in order: |
[Jan. 21st, 2007|04:52 am] |
Last semester....
I came home from summer camp defeated once again. At the end of my rope, I had invited my best friend Brian Carlisle (my roomate now and always my best friend through thick and thin) to come with me to work at Star Ranch. I was sure that I could be a MAN and not let Katie Pitts or other problems affect me.
This last summer did not turn out the way I planned (of course I had given up hope of Katie ever not hating me but I was still surprised at the way things turned out) I had planned on Brian being there for me but he had shit of his own to work out. Namely, breaking an engagement of his girlfriend of five years. My loyalties run deep, but it was hard for me to talk to Liz ( the girlfriend of five years, see above) and not feel guilty.
I returned home to San Angelo, feeling more defeated than ever and unprepared for the next chapter my relationships with women would unfold.
"Loneliness, far from being an isolated feeling, is the general condition of the human race."
Defeated, and 21 years old I find myself at the bar with one of my eldest sisters friends, one of the most beautiful girls I've ever met, Rachel Clark. She spews bitterness and cynicism. I reply in turn. This is around august.
I tell everyone that I will date this girl and she will be my next girlfriend.
We meet again at a bar and I tell her of Katie and the hurt and pain of regret.
She replies in kind by fucking my brains out.
Now, Rachel Clark is 5 years my senior, experienced in men and relationships. I am experienced in hurt and longing.
I do my best which drives her away. I spend two months in her bed to find out she is ready to be married and she dare not marry an Aethist, hopeless fool.
I spend the next two months after her in a daze...
ADVENTURES IN ALCOHOLISM.
Which is where I find myself. I have my own apartment, I am soon to buy my first house (which I plan to sell for profit) and yet the only thing I can think of is a wife.
Which now brings me back to the Christian girl I fucked over years ago.
Everyone has the rainbow they didn't have their camera on hand for.
Katie is my lost family, the girl I wanted to marry and now I find myself in a cycle of meaningless sex and misogynistic relationships.
I value women highly and this is not what I thought I would be: a sleezeball at the end of his rope. |
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| Jeez. |
[Dec. 17th, 2006|03:15 am] |
I haven't updated in almost a month! Ok so I quit Ross. I am now a delivery driver for Pizza Hut and i fucking love it. I just drive around and listen to music.
I am soon to have a.....
NEW YEARS EVE PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Don't even worry about if I don't like you or anything like that, come by! Everyone and anyone is invited to my goddamm party.
Additionally, I have sworn off women. Seeing as I will soon be wearing braces at the age of 22 it's not like I'll be missing anything. |
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| I AM SO FUCKING GOOD AND COOL AND NOT EVIL! |
[Nov. 21st, 2006|11:35 pm] |
HAPPY X-GIVING FUCKERZZ LRN2RDRBIBLEZ FCKN N00BZ LOLZZZZZ!
ZOMG I'M TEH 1337EST PERSON EVAR!!!!!!!! I'M SECKSAY H4XX0RZ AND SHIZNIT!!!!! BRAIN AND I ARE GONNA FEED LIKE 100 HUNDRED PEOPLE FOR THANKSGIVING FOR CHARITY AND SHIT!!! I CAN'T EVEN COOK!!!! I SMELL A SITCOM!!!! ROFLMAO! LIEK IF YOU WANT TO GRP PST OR DROP A LINE ON THIS BLOG! |
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| Turn that cynical eye on yourself.... |
[Nov. 17th, 2006|03:52 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Paper thin walls - modest mouse | ] |
PART ONE: A DOSE OF REALITY
OH man! Sometimes in life you just have to be real with yourself. I'm 22 and I still don't have my bachelors. I drink and party way too much and my relationships with women never last longer than a couple of months. I forget my keys about 6 to 8 times a day. I am late for my job almost everyday. I love porn and shitty music like nelly furtado's new album or the new justin timberlake. I am about to get braces on and oh man that is gonna really get me laid. I have no five year plan, let alone a two year plan.
I still kinda like me anyway =)
Honestly I've been pretty bored since michael bolton came into town.
Let's talk about that!
PART 2: REALITY SUCKS, LET'S HAVE A BEER!
About two weeks ago I had the best day in a looooooong time. It was a friday and I awoke with a sense of purpose. A rainbow shot out my ass and a bluebird landed on my shoulder as I got out of bed. Did I say bed? I meant futon. (Maybe the futon belongs in part one) I did the morning thing but it was one in the afternoon and drove to work to pick up my check. Lo and behold, there was an extra fifty dollas on that sexy bitch! Even better, my boss told me that I didn't have to work because of a payroll cut!
So, I find myself with the day off. Yet, I have no buddy to spend the day with. I remember that michael bolton, and old college buddy is in town. I drive to ASU's theater dept., where I can still just walk in and see what's going on with my old group at any time. There was michael himself, fat as ever and macarthur moore was there too! We go to wingstop and have fifty wings and some french fries and cole slaw and beer.
I agree to meet up with them later that night, and head to hastings. Now, I'd been looking for Jesse Harris and the Ferdanandos for about three weeks by this point. I checked the used aisles.... no luck. DAMMIT. I check the fucking info kiosk. It says they have it in used!!!! I JUST FUCKING CHECKED GODDAMMIT!!! I look again.... I find it!
I go home and put that bitch in. Eargasm.
I take a nap.
My roommate matt wakes me up. Apparently they added something new to the burning crusades. (I'm in the expansion pack beta and you're not). I fuck around for about an hour and head up to the penny.
now, it sucks cause as soon as I'm paying my cover i see goddam rachel there and that's awkward as shit (because she wants it to be like that.... long story, she's a sociopath with control and committment issues) and go sit with a table of old theater fuckers like myself. she's sitting at the same damn table but it's cool cause everyone there loved me and i think only two people knew her.
Goddamm i'm petty.
Anyway the concert was space cadet and they were ok. They covered the ramones and i sang along.
We left and went to a party at some sophomores apartment.
Now I was the only one who brought beer apparently. Everyone had fucking boones or shitty ass wine. It was a lot of fun telling old stories....
Anyway this girl was there that lives upstairs from me at college hills west. I offered to give her a ride home and convinced her to listen to my new cd.
so she spent the night with me on the futon.
PART THREE: THE FUTON
The futon I pay one hundred dollars a month to sleep on is the shittiest, most uncomfortable fucking thing in the world.
It sucks to sit in almost as bad as it does to sleep in the lumpy fucker. It has these awkward buttons that are scratchy and make me want to kill something. and when it's folded out, it sags in the middle. I mean it's bad when I sleep in it, and it's horrible when 2 people sleep in it.
Now, so far I have fucked two girls on this monstrosity.
I am more amazed than anyone else about this fact.
Since I will be moving apartments and will soon have a proper bedroom and accompanying bed, I think it is only proper that I give this futon the proper sendoff.
I have till December 19th to convince as many girls as I can to fuck me on this alter to satan.
We all must have goals, right?
PART FOUR: AN EVEN SHITTIER GOAL
I get my wisdom teeth taken out in about ten hours.
fuck my ass. |
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| I'm in love with a stripper...... |
[Nov. 10th, 2006|02:54 am] |
Do do doo doo do doo doo do do dooo do... I met a stripper tonight and I think I want to date her. She's coming to Chris Mayer's BDay party tomorrow night.
I'm sure only good can come of this. |
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| Oh muh Gawd! |
[Nov. 9th, 2006|09:15 pm] |
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I'm totally popping a big nerd BONER cause Spider-Man three trailer premiers in like forty-five minutes!!!!! |
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| I |
[Nov. 3rd, 2006|01:17 pm] |
I R POST ON TEH INTRAWEB!!!!!!!!!!1111111111111111oneoneoneone
Man, i gotta quit getting on livejournal when I'm drunk! Last night I went out drinking with brian carlisle (what's new?) and it was pretty fun. I met this guy who is the manager of red bull for all of west texas and got some free jager shots out of it. He was actually pretty cool and we're supposed to call him in a couple of weeks. Only other interesting thing was there were two girls at the bar who were wearing sweaters that barely covered their boobs and I mean barely... I kept waiting for their titties to pop out but it never happened. Like blink says, some girls try too hard.
I'm done with promiscuity! I never really got all that started, but for what it's worth I'm done with it. No more shitty, random hookups! I didn't post this but a week or two ago I was at some party, and this girl sat in my lap and started kissing my neck and asking me to spend the night. I agreed, got into bed, and slept.
She asked why I didn't want to fuck her and I was like.... let's cuddle, I'm tired.
There were actually two reasons.
1. Drunk, sloppy sex is the worst. Cruelest joke of God is that alcohol arouses the desire not the performance (shakespeare you fucking noobs). And it sucks cause drunk girls are so fucking horny for no reason! Last girl I dated could be pissed at me all day and we'd have some beers and she'd want to fuck. I felt dirty. For shame!
2. Scratch that, condoms are THE WORST. I would rather masterbate. Condoms horrify me. If I'm worried about STD's I should probably keep my dick entirely out of her. I hate condoms.
Going to a party tonight, I'll let you know how it goes. |
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| Goddammit! |
[Nov. 3rd, 2006|03:34 am] |
It's the same 5 people in my buddys list who keep posting! Tell me about scrabble nights!
And I'll talk about the immorality you can't imagine!
Deal? |
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| It's not all that bad. |
[Nov. 3rd, 2006|03:23 am] |
| [ | music |
| | Jesse Harris - What makes you? | ] |
Well, last post was pretty dreary. My life is pretty damn good right now. Rachel was a shot of life. I loved the time we spent together and I'm pretty thankful for it. Rachel was a friend of my older sister's and she had a way of letting me know things about myself I could have never learned through introspection. As far as college goes, I have options open toward me I've never had in my life and that is definitely something to cheer about.
I have but one worry.
I am not who I want to be, I probably will not ever be uhoh oh no how low how lowohoh? |
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| It's been a while. |
[Nov. 1st, 2006|11:27 am] |
Rachel dumped me.
I still work at Ross.
Lease is almost up on the apartment.
Big changes ahead.
Kinda pissed off right now, mainly at myself. |
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| Music Post. |
[Oct. 5th, 2006|06:04 pm] |
Ok so I've been listening to Sufjan Stevens a hell of a lot lately. It gets very stuck in my head.
Old 97s is having a concert at stubbs on friday the 13th. I reeeeeeeeeelly wanna go, I'm not sure if Rachel will wanna go so if anyone wants to come with me let me know.
And I like Belle and Sebastion too, and Built for Spill is a lot of fun.
That's about all I've been listening to lately.
You know I should make a post about Rachel, the girl I'm dating, but I wanna be in the right mood. |
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